Is this poem good, Written from view of dying man wanting his love?

I think you have vast potential but you are attempting to write beyond what you have experienced and that will always make the task daunting and probably not a great work. Also you need to watch your spelling and make sure what you are saying fits together. I will say your vocabulary is colorful and you show that you have variety. If you were to write that which is true to your emotions and from your life truth, I believe you could write a great poem.